“God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble.”(Psalm 46:1)
A few years ago we bought a boat. I know, “a hole in the water to throw money in.” “B-O-A-T=Bring On Another Thousand.” “The second greatest day of my life was when I bought a boat, the greatest was when I sold it.” Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard them all. All the terrible things about owning a boat. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not disagreeing with them, I just happen to love boats regardless of the pitfalls. Our boat was an old boat that needed a lot of work. So I jumped in head first and tightened, cleaned, patched, hammered, repaired, calked, painted, waxed, straightened, replaced most everything on it. Did I mention that it was an old boat and needed a lot of work? On the maiden voyage- and when I say voyage, I mean 100 yards from the dock- she cratered on me. The engine wouldn’t start. I was adrift, getting further from the shore. The wind was quite strong that day and the boat was really being shoved around. The lake was rather large and I had no control over where I was headed. I was being pushed toward a rocky shore line which could possibly ruin the hull if I ran aground. No problem though. I had spent good money on extras for this boat. A soft comfy seat, extra-powerful binoculars and a brand new anchor. I opened the storage compartment to get the anchor and it was empty! No anchor! Where’s the new anchor? Then I remembered… I sat in my soft comfy seat, got out my extra-powerful binoculars and looked back towards the shore. There, on the dock, was my brand new anchor! A help that is not present is no help at all.
Today we received more depressing news on our cancer battle. The third tumor that was found at the time of surgery has been deemed to be extremely aggressive. Somehow it is either a different strand or a stronger type. I would love to explain it to you, but I don’t understand it myself. There is so much information coming at us when we visit the doctors, that I just can’t take it all in. We take notes. We jog each other’s memories and then we come home and look up terms and find out about treatments from the literature that they give us. On every visit to the oncologist, we bring home another library of medical jargon with warnings of side effects that the medications will cause. Hair loss, numbness, weight gain, stroke, paralysis, heart attack. If the cancer doesn’t get you, don’t worry, there are lots of other things just waiting for you! We had 21 weeks of chemotherapy scheduled to be followed by radiation as of yesterday. Now, with the new diagnosis, the chemo is extended to a year. The pain, the time, the cost all starts to stack up! It’s almost overwhelming. Then the Word came so sweetly. “Ever present. Ever present help.” He is more that just present. He is ever present. You can’t lose Him. He never takes time off. He is never disconnected. HE’S NEVER NOT THERE! I don’t have to worry about being shoved around by every wind or crashing on the rocks. He’s right there with me. I can rest in Him. I can find refuge in Him. I can hide in Him. That’s where we are right now. Today has been a tough one, but we are not here to whine. Though we’ve cried and struggled through the news of the day, to know that He was with us in the middle of it all gives us peace. If you need us tomorrow, or any other day, we’ll just be resting in Him. Love to all!